Return of The Dutchess…

27 11 2014

The Cali native formerly known as Stacy Ann Ferguson has dropped a new single, and it’s as sun-baked and carefree as you’d expect from the sultry voice on every other party anthem of the 2000s.

Robbie Daw for Idolator observes, “The DJ Mustard-produced track finds the 39-year-old Black Eyed Peas diva surprisingly stuck in creative rut, spouting out a slew of hip-hop-lite cliches that, to be honest, we would have expected her to have left behind sometime around The E.N.D. ”

Fergie Ferg is so much better when she actually SINGS! I have always been confused as to why they make her talk over these club beats, or trot her out for a looped and dreamy hook. It’s like will.i.am didn’t know what he H. A. D. in his arsenal. I discussed this, at length, in a blog post almost four years ago… I’m starting to feel like Fergie’s leading me on.

As I’ve pointed out before, this long-awaited sophomore album can serve as second act for the former Black Eyed Pea and the sky’s the limit if only she would give existing fans a bone. (We’re here and we’re waiting! Reward us! Give us something we can share with friends and proudly say “I told you so!”)  I’ve literally been watching this woman sing her way to deserved stardom since a little known 90s girl band (Wild Orchid) hosted a fun but forgettable Saturday morning talent show (Great Pretenders).

This “LA Love” stuff is OK for radio buzz, but give me those love-hardened, crushed velvet pipes on a power ballad ala “Big Girls Don’t Cry” any day. The Dutchess is approaching 40, and she still got it, but she needs to start owning it. “LA Love” isn’t as fun as “Fergalicious” or “Clumsy,” and certainly lacks the confident sass of “Glamourous” and “Pedestal.” It’s an empty spectacle, not a hit.

At least her husband seems proud of her-- Josh Duhamel was kind enough to appear at the American Music Awards last Sunday to introduce Fergie's live performance of the track. 

At least her husband seems proud of her– Josh Duhamel was kind enough to appear at the American Music Awards last Sunday to introduce Fergie’s live performance of the track.

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Tyler Shields is a raging psychopath

20 06 2012

So I wasn’t really jazzed when E! was promoting the new show Mrs. Eastwood & Company, but I ended up catching bits of the first few episodes… I don’t hate it. I’m not sure who thought up this program (though I suspect Seacrest had a tiny hand in it!), the family seems amusing enough but I doubt anyone in E!’s young demographic was dying to know about Clint Eastwood’s second wife.

Dina Eastwood is a pretty cool lady. 
After growing up in a working-class family in Castro Valley, CA, she received a degree in broadcast journalism from San Francisco State.  She worked at various locally oriented stations through the early 90s, before meeting and marrying Eastwood in 1996. Dina would go on to host an educationally based television program “Quest for Excellence” in 1998.

I find that Dina is full of energy, investing herself fully into whatever task lay at hand. I hesitate to say she comes off as too pleased with her status as A-List spouse, because she imparts very reasonable lessons whilst trying to reign in her privileged daughters.

She seems to have a true journalist spirit, interests across the board and a deep-seeded desire to learn about them all. The project of the moment being manager to South African a cappella boyband ‘Overtone,’ to whom she was introduced while accompanying Clint on location for Invictus (2009).

Also featured on the reality show are Dina’s “company.”
Step-daughter Francesca Fisher-Eastwood (18), daughter Morgan (15), Lisa Thrash (family housekeeper), the 6 guys of ‘Overtone,’ and Francesca’s insane liar of a boyfriend, photographer Tyler Shields (30).

And that brings me to my topic: TYLER SHIELDS.

Within minutes of his first appearance on the screen, I knew he was bad news. And I couldn’t help but wonder why his name was so familiar…  Behold the magic of Google. Shields is a professional photographer/artist, known publicly for his highly controversial pictorials with a gun-toting Lindsay Lohan and battered Heather Morris.

 

The Florida native was previously a ranked vert skater, having participated in the X-Games and tours with the Godfather of Skateboarding, Tony Hawk.
With no formal training to speak of, Shields seems to have fallen into his (current) profession the way so many people caught their breaks in the early 2000s: via Myspace. He has been deemed “young Hollywoods favorite photographer” by several online outlets, including PopEater, Celebuzz and the Daily Mail.

 I am stunned at the number of up-and-comers who pose for/with him. They seek Shields out, perhaps behind the backs of their management, in order to get the thrill of working with the crazy blood guy.

Well this guy is so egomaniacal, on Sundays episode he went so far as to tell Dina Eastwood he was a doctor when one of Morgan’s young friends was injured in the family swimming pool. (Her nose was bloody, though not broken.)  He has Francesca totally under a spell. She stated in an interview for the episode that he is “the one.”
I think he’s “the one” who is going to dump her when he gets where he wants to be. Dating the daughter of one of the most prolific actor/directors alive today, and appearing on the family’s reality show, is a great way to market himself.
And that fact has NOT escaped Shields’ consciousness.  The shock value of his work right now is not going to garner him the staying power of other and historical significance of David LaChappelle or Andres Serrano.

Francesca Eastwood, who has already posed for Shields in two not-so-safe scenarios (hanging precariously off a bridge and mutilating a $100k flaming handbag with a chainsaw), could end up in jail — as the cast of The CW’s Vampire Diaries found themselves in 2009 after a night romp in Georgia with Shields– or worse, as death threats for the pair have flown in since the artistic incident aired on June 10.

The latest episode also revealed that Shields is not “close” with his own family, therefore excited at the prospect of being accepted by the Eastwoods. His own family probably recognized those sociopathic tendencies and flair for the grandiose that Dina picked up on.
Subsequently, Dina declared that she never wanted to be in the same room with him again. Easier said than done when you’re (literally) on an island.